Jokes Thread

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Trinity765
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Trinity765 »

;)
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Re: Jokes Thread

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"Be kind to past versions of yourself that didn't know what you know now."
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Five ants rented a house with another five ants. Now they're tenants...
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

Just been told the landlord at my local pub has announced there's going to be a hefty cash prize for this years best costume for Halloween again. 👍

Last year the wife won it 😳

and she only came to pick me up. :D
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Re: Jokes Thread

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....
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Horse »

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Took me two goes to see it ...
Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by KungFooBob »

Made I larf.
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Count Steer
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Reminds me of the 3-footed dog that pitched up at the vets and said:

'Ah've come for ma paw'.

Or the other version where it limps into a saloon and says:

'I'm looking for the man who shot ma paw'.
The plural of 'anecdote' is not 'data'.
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Re: Jokes Thread

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:?

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The Martian
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by The Martian »

Saw my mate Dave yesterday who lost an arm in an accident and asked where he was off to
"going to change a lightbulb" he said
I laughed at him and said "good luck with that lol"
"I'll be fine" he replied "I've got the receipt you cheeky twat"
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by weeksy »

Yes, I've deleted some posts. No, we're not discussing it, rule 1.

1. Don't be a dick.
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Felix
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Felix »

Count Steer wrote: Tue Oct 24, 2023 9:18 am Reminds me of the 3-footed dog that pitched up at the vets and said:

'Ah've come for ma paw'.

Or the other version where it limps into a saloon and says:

'I'm looking for the man who shot ma paw'.
The 2nd version i remember from school in the mid 70's but i am sure it was an old joke back then
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Felix »

The wife told me the cat needed to be chipped.

I only had a nine iron, but I still got it over the shed.
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Horse »

As much as I dislike trick or treat, these amused.
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Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

Just seen a dyslexic Yorkshireman wearing a cat flap...
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Trinity765 »

Dyslexic walks into a bra.
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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