Jokes Thread

[Yorick]

RIP Roger

Wrong thread. But Googled and I did like him

[Count Steer]

RIP Roger

Ripped Roger surely?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roger_(kangaroo)

PS He died about 4-5 years ago so not exactly a candidate for the just dead thread.

[MrLongbeard]

RIP Roger

Ripped Roger surely?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roger_(kangaroo)

PS He died about 4-5 years ago so not exactly a candidate for the just dead thread.

I know, if you search back he's probably in there, I just went off a googling to see if it was him, and it is, or was.

[Count Steer]

RIP Roger

Ripped Roger surely?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roger_(kangaroo)

PS He died about 4-5 years ago so not exactly a candidate for the just dead thread.

I know, if you search back he's probably in there, I just went off a googling to see if it was him, and it is, or was.

It wasn't you that said 'wrong thread'.

(Roger Whittaker did die in 2023 though...but he wasn't a kangaroo ).

[Mussels]

I'm not sure that kangaroo is much different to normal, the one I squared up with in Singapore looked pretty much like that.
Having accidentally corned a deer in the past I'd rather face the marsupial than have those hooves flying around at head height.

[Count Steer]

Well, if you think yer 'ard enough...

[Taipan]

Well, if you think yer 'ard enough...

[Felix]

I asked an elderly bloke why he was using 2 massive frozen chips as walking sticks.
He replied 'They're McCains!'

[KungFooBob]

Well it made me larf.

[Trinity765]

[KungFooBob]

Well I thought it was funny.

[Felix]

I've got a new job doing shift work making chess sets.

I'm on Knights next week.

[Taipan]

[KungFooBob]

Might need more than a screwdriver through it to get it off.

[Taipan]

Two Ladies Talking in Heaven

1st woman:
Hi, Wanda!

2nd woman:
Hi, Sylvia! How'd you die?

1st woman:
I froze to death.

2nd woman:
How horrible!

1st woman:
It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I
began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?

2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

1st woman: So, what happened?

2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer-we'd both still be alive.

[KungFooBob]

Yup.

[Taipan]

[Taipan]

[Taipan]

[Taipan]

I just bought a Humpty Dumpty toy from Aldi. It's brilliant! It comes with Aldi Kings Horse and Aldi Kings Men!