Wind blown out of my sails...F***!!

[Dixiethedog]

I am going to start with "F***!!!!!".

I have been busy doing a paint job for a mate, who was going to start a new business doing custom bikes up in bonny Scotland. I have done bits and pieces for him before, and I know sometimes communication can be very slow, as in sometimes months. Well, the last day or so has seen me rewiring and re-doing the lighting in my spraybooth shed, and to test it all out I thought another coat of clear would not hurt on one of the pieces that I have been busy with for Andrew.

As I waited for paint to dry (even though the job in some people's eyes would have been finished) I did a multi bike insurance search online again for a new quote. To retreive the quote I had to jump into my emails where I spotted a new mail with his name. Great , I thought,at long last. I'll get things boxed up and sent back once he gives me his new business address.

And honestly, the e mail hit me like a ton of bricks. Andrew has very sadly passed away. Literally 10 minutes before reading the e mail I had one of his panels that I had painted outside in the sunshine showing a neighbour how happy I thought that he would be to see it!

To say I am gutted to hear this news would be a massive understatement. Andrew was a smashing bloke, and had he lived closer by I think that me and him would have been much much closer mates than we were due to the distances seperating us. I would like to think that in many ways we were two peas in a pod with some of the custom ideas we had discussed.

I was aware that Andrew had had the Big C, but believed he was winning and moving forward in life.

I just feel empty as I type this. Devastated, sad and absolutely shocked at the bad news.

RIP Andrew, I am not much of a drinker, but I am going to raise a glass to you tonight.

F***!!!!

[Horse]

Bugger

RIP

[ogri]

Sorry for your loss!

[demographic]

I recently lost a mate who I've known since the start of secondary school, so thats 42 years. It's been quite a blow, and I went his funeral last Monday.
We used to go camping up in the fells and as it was when we had spare time it somehow ended up being between Christmas and New Year.
Always freezing and always a good laugh.
This was a bloke who did a tour on Iraq in the bomb squad, I only had his first name in my phone, didn't have his full details as I just didn't need em. He'd just rock up and we'd be off for the weekend.
<Shrug> just life I guess.

[David]

I can see how that stings......but...none of us are getting younger (I am 76)....I had to deal with some insurance stuff (long story) recently, and thought I should check to find my ex wife...bugger....she died in 1990....tho she would have been 86 by now...she was only 51...it is a fate awaiting us all...enjoy the now, those passed would be pissed with us if we didn't.

[Buckaroo]

That sucks! What a way to find out. Sorry @Dixiethedog

[Felix]

Gut wrenching. Sorry for your loss.

[mangocrazy]

I feel your pain. I'm attending the funeral of my younger sister tomorrow.

Don't put off till tomorrow what you can do today.

[Dixiethedog]

Thank you all for your comments.

I know that we have all lost people, sometimes it hurts, and sometimes if and when they have been suffering, you just think that you are pleased the pain is over and that they can rest in peace. But yesterdays news hit me hard.

I knew my mate had had the Big C, but I honestly thought it was under control as he was so full of ideas for the future. The last time we spoke he mentioned that he had bought a couple of Harley's that he wanted me to do some work on and he sounded excited. Not like a man who was going to die. Not yet. We are all going to go one day, but I did not see this coming.

I have been trying to compose, write or come up with a reply e-mail to his daughter who let me hear the news, and I have lot's to say but I understand sometimes short and sweet might be best. One thing for sure is that I need to get his paint job back to his family so that they can at least sit it onto the build he was doing and then take things in which ever way they decide once the time is right. I just hope that if it goes to a new owner they have the integrity to honour Andrew once it is all complete.

But bugger, bugger bugger. And I have missed his send off. I would have driven up to Scotland to be there and pay my respects.

When Andrew and myself first crossed paths he asked me to paint his big bore custom Katana. "What ideas do you have?" I asked. "Black and blue, he replied. Light blue, dark blue, medium blue, metallic, candy...?? I asked. " I don't know?" And so it went on. The next thing I know, his kat bodywork turns up in the post and I am still none the wiser as to exactly what to do with it? I sent him paint manufacturers paint (online) colour chips that covered almost every colour every produced on any car and waited for a "I like such and such a colour". But no, nothing. I was a friend car spray shop talking about it and my mate said, "I have loads of half full cans of paints from paint jobs, take whatever you want". By chance there was a lovely black paint with blue pearl in it and (I think?) a blue Lotus car paint, which was the paint I used. All free. So, once the job was done I told him that I have not had to buy anything to do the job, I used stuff that was already paid for, so I sent it back to him all for free, nothing. He paid the courier, but other wise free. Because I liked him. I knew he was a genuine decent bloke who had a life long history of bikes very much like the ones I have had over the years. And he was part of the brotherhood if you like.

The flakey paint job thing I have done again was going to be a freebie. I loved the idea of him starting a new bike business and I was honoured that he asked me to be a part of what was going to be the shop display rolling advert bike. Mind you, he had paid for (some! ) paint materials this time. I can't believe that yesterday I was showing his petrol tank to my neighbour in the sunshine and we were both "oooing and arring" at the glittery green paint with me saying things along the lines of, "I bet he will love it".

But thank you all once again for your comments.

[Dixiethedog]

I feel your pain. I'm attending the funeral of my younger sister tomorrow.

Don't put off till tomorrow what you can do today.

I am sorry to hear this sad news. I hope that the day goes off smoothly. Condolences to you, your family and all of other people around your sister. May she RIP.

[Dixiethedog]

I recently lost a mate who I've known since the start of secondary school, so thats 42 years. It's been quite a blow, and I went his funeral last Monday.
We used to go camping up in the fells and as it was when we had spare time it somehow ended up being between Christmas and New Year.
Always freezing and always a good laugh.
This was a bloke who did a tour on Iraq in the bomb squad, I only had his first name in my phone, didn't have his full details as I just didn't need em. He'd just rock up and we'd be off for the weekend.
<Shrug> just life I guess.

Your mate sounds like he was quite a character. I bet that he put more into his years than some 80 years old that I know could ever achieve even if they lived to be 100.

I sometimes wish that I had a friend who would just rock up and we could then escape on some sort of adventure.

May your mate RIP.

He wasn't called Weemie, was he? A mate of mine went to a funeral for somebody who sounds very much like the way your mate sounded. Ex army, game for a laugh with no f***s given. Top bloke.

[Dixiethedog]

For me, I think I will draw my thoughts to a close with this.
Last week I met Simon (Youtube Channell Songs from the Saddle), and last night I was watching some of his videos. One of which kind of struck a thought into my head. Momento Mori, which I had not heard before, which apparently is Latin for "Remember you will die".

Get out there people, do the things that make you happy. Momento Mori !!!!

Simon's video. If you check it out, go to about 4.25. Get out there and live.

[edulord]

It’s strange how grief sneaks up on you like that, one minute you're hyped about finishing something for a mate, next you're just... hollow. You can really feel how much Andrew meant to you in the way you talked about those projects. That kind of connection doesn’t come around often.

And that “black and blue” moment legit made me smile through the lump in my throat. Pure chaos, but the kind that only happens between proper mates.

[Dixiethedog]

It’s strange how grief sneaks up on you like that, one minute you're hyped about finishing something for a mate, next you're just... hollow. You can really feel how much Andrew meant to you in the way you talked about those projects. That kind of connection doesn’t come around often.

And that “black and blue” moment legit made me smile through the lump in my throat. Pure chaos, but the kind that only happens between proper mates.

Thank you mate.

[Dixiethedog]

I was kind of done with this (with respect to Andrew of course), but things it seems have come to light and I think that I may have jumped the gun when I said or thought it was the Big C that took him?
Well, having a look online, I have just read something from his daughter (I believe) from the 19th of March basically asking anybody who has seen her Dad to get in touch, and then a very saddening report to say that her Dad's body had been found on the 23rd of the month.
Apparently he had left his phone at home and vanished.
What a bloody shame.

[Dickyboy]

O man, that's really tough, lost a few mates and family along the way, it's never easy whatever the circumstances, but that's pretty much the worst. Condolences.

[Noggin]

I was kind of done with this (with respect to Andrew of course), but things it seems have come to light and I think that I may have jumped the gun when I said or thought it was the Big C that took him?
Well, having a look online, I have just read something from his daughter (I believe) from the 19th of March basically asking anybody who has seen her Dad to get in touch, and then a very saddening report to say that her Dad's body had been found on the 23rd of the month.
Apparently he had left his phone at home and vanished.
What a bloody shame.

Sometimes, if it looks like Cancer will win, people prefer another option. It's quicker, less painful and often less horrible for all. I know that option is horrible at the time, but it is shorter, which in time people and family will realise that it probably was better, at least for the person with the disease.

Keep remembering him as you did before you found out xxx

[Noggin]

I have been trying to compose, write or come up with a reply e-mail to his daughter who let me hear the news, and I have lot's to say but I understand sometimes short and sweet might be best.

Short and sweet for an email - but later, if you write stuff down for his daughter, she will appreciate the memories for sure xx

[demographic]

I recently lost a mate who I've known since the start of secondary school, so thats 42 years. It's been quite a blow, and I went his funeral last Monday.
We used to go camping up in the fells and as it was when we had spare time it somehow ended up being between Christmas and New Year.
Always freezing and always a good laugh.
This was a bloke who did a tour on Iraq in the bomb squad, I only had his first name in my phone, didn't have his full details as I just didn't need em. He'd just rock up and we'd be off for the weekend.
<Shrug> just life I guess.

Your mate sounds like he was quite a character. I bet that he put more into his years than some 80 years old that I know could ever achieve even if they lived to be 100.

I sometimes wish that I had a friend who would just rock up and we could then escape on some sort of adventure.

May your mate RIP.

He wasn't called Weemie, was he? A mate of mine went to a funeral for somebody who sounds very much like the way your mate sounded. Ex army, game for a laugh with no f***s given. Top bloke.

He was called Kev, he possibly had nicknames in the forces but I've not heard em.
He had a heart attack about a week before he died but was on a respirator and reading between the lines was pretty much cabbaged since the heart attack.
They gave him.a bit of time then pulled the plug on him.
Reads like I'm bitter about that but I'm not at all, I wouldn't put a dog through that kind of living.

[Big Red]

I am sorry for your loss and know of Andrew and the search that had taken place when he went missing.
Very sad news and a very much liked guy locally.